Motivating your children

This essay is based on an e-mail I wrote in response to a home school mother with two sons, who was using the Robinson Curriculum.

The reason she wrote to me was that her two sons were taking far too long to progress through their school work- they were working "12-14 hours a day" to complete what should have been accomplished in 5 hours, according to the Robinson Curriculum methodology. She was under the impression that this might be the fault of the Robinson Curriculum, and I might have surmised that the work that her sons were doing was too difficult for them, which might be a reason for such a slow pace.

However, in her e-mail she mentioned something that I thought was very revealing. She said that if she "sat right next to them" they would get their work done, but if she was busy or had to leave, they would then just spend their day sitting at their desk.

This was revealing because it showed that the problem was not one of difficulty with the material, but rather a work ethic and concentration issue.

Following is my response and advice to her on dealing with this problem. I think you may find it helpful as well if you face a similar issue.

          "From what you are saying, it seems like your problem is more of a motivation or concentration issue than a problem with the class books. Different children have different difficulties, but I can tell you some of the things that I have noticed from my own experience.

            My brother has always had difficulty staying motivated and concentrating on a task, and so it would often take him a very long time to get through a lesson of math. If he kept taking too long and it was obvious that it was simply a discipline issue, my mom would sometimes tell him that he would not be allowed to eat lunch until he finished a set number of math problems. Other times, if he was hoping to go to a friend’s house or had some other motivation, that would be enough to get him to finish his work at a reasonable pace.  

            Another thing she did was to remove distractions as best as she could from his surroundings. This was something Dr. Robinson did for his children as well. I had a couple of opportunities to stay with them over the years growing up, and I while there I would do my homework with the rest of his children. Dr. Robinson had a small separate cabin next to his house where the children and he worked. Inside there was very little to sway your attention. Each of the children had a desk, a chair, pencil, paper, and textbook. That was all. It was a very focused study environment. Obviously not everyone has access to a separate building, but the point is to reduce the number of available distractions.
 

            What I have noticed is that often the reason a child takes a long time to do a task is not that they don't know what to do. Often they know exactly what needs to be done, but seem unable to keep moving from one task to the next without wandering. I think this is at least partly because of our sinful natures- we don't want to work, and even when we do want to work, there is resistance inside of us that has to be overcome time and time again. The more this resistance is overcome the weaker it becomes, which is one of the great things about Dr. Robinson's methodology- by not babysitting the student from one task to the next, the child is forced to learn to overcome this inner resistance to learning, and builds his/her work ethic. However, if the child yields to the temptation to dawdle, and is allowed to continue in this pattern of self indulgence, it can become more and more difficult for them to focus on a single task. I think this is one possible explanation for the new learning 'disability' called ADD in our current day. 

            In a way, learning mental discipline is a lot like learning physical discipline. Your body doesn't want to run any further, and tells you to stop, but you have to keep pushing forward. Your body doesn't want to do another push-up, but you have to keep going, and do at least one more. By pushing your limits, eventually what used to be difficult becomes almost effortless. It's the same when doing a stressful mental exercise. The student must be made to push the limits of his concentration, his memory, and his self-discipline.  

Perhaps I've gotten a little off topic, but self discipline is something that I know I need to keep striving for myself. If you would like, I suggest you join either the Facebook or Yahoo groups for the Robinson Curriculum and Eclectic Education Series. The links to those places are on the websites. There you will be able to get tips from other home school mothers, who I assure you have in the past faced many of the same problems you face today. 

Above all, don't give up! It takes effort to home school, but it is well worth it. One thing to keep in mind is something that I remember Dr. Robinson once saying- that a child would be better off spending his childhood playing at home than attending a public school. Because while he might not learn much playing in the yard, he at least wouldn't be subject the evil influences of the modern public school system. (If you don’t believe me, watch the new IndoctriNation movie) For me at least, that has always been a heartening thing to remember. 

Keep homeschooling! "